I am advising a leader right now who has high expectations of others. Someone on her team can’t seem to meet those expectations on a project, and there isn’t much flexibility to upskill, move, or replace them. It is creating tension. The leader has three choices in the face of this tension: absorb it, avoid
How do you sell (or outreach, fundraise, negotiate, network, interview, or gain buy-in) when the people you’re trying to reach are remote and afraid? Being socially distanced can prove to be challenging but also full of opportunity for new growth and outreach. Giving in to fear and isolating yourself beyond necessary means will only lead
Take a moment to watch Bill Gates in this video. Consider how you view his credibility. According to a global poll of 42,000 people, he’s the most admired person in the world. He generates instant credibility, doesn’t he? When you watch, your brain remembers something about his accomplishments and wealth. But you can’t process all
Credibility: the quality of being trusted and believed in. (Oxford Dictionary) Think for a moment about where in your life you’d like more credibility. Perhaps it’s with people in your company who aren’t on your team or in your department. Maybe you’d like more credibility with potential customers, or with a group or community that’s
I often wonder what meetings would be like if there were time limits on each person speaking. In professional basketball, for example, they allow each team 24 seconds to take their shot at the net. The clock resets only after a team has attempted their shot or turned the ball over to the other team. Think
Do you ever feel resentful that people aren’t listening well enough to you when you talk? Perhaps it’s your boss, a client, or your husband. Maybe you’ve said, “I told you that, but you didn’t listen!” Or you’ve thought, “Why are people on their phones in our meetings!?” It can be a difficult and frustrating
The decision to do or not do something, to support or not support something, to spend money or not spend money on something…despite what you might think, these aren’t logical choices. Decisions are made in the emotional/intuitive part of the brain. So how do you get people to change their mind? Emotions Over Logic Research
When a person is guarded, it is almost impossible to have an influence on them. Perhaps you can coerce, control, or manipulate them, but persuade, influence, or gain their cooperation? Not so much. Ask a trained hostage negotiator. Former lead international kidnapping negotiator for the FBI, Chris Voss, says: Though the intensity may differ from
A good friend of mine recently offered an interesting perspective from the top of the organization he leads. He remarked that leaders (of any organization, team, community, or family) should expect to continuously have to make complex and ambiguous decisions. After all, if they weren’t complex or ambiguous, they would have been decided at lower
When is a question more than just a question? Here’s a good example: Have you ever thought about seeing a therapist? That’s actually advice disguised as a question. The problem is, rather than generating dialogue, these kinds of questions often elicit a defense like: I’ve tried…I’ve thought of that…That won’t work because… Do you ever ask
Matt Norman is president of Norman & Associates, which offers Dale Carnegie Training in the North Central US. Dale Carnegie Training is a global organization ...READ MORE