By the time you read this, my son will have performed his guitar and vocal solo. It’s his first and final high school solo concert performed over three nights, in front of hundreds of people. He has been anxiously anticipating this moment on the stage since the tryouts months ago. That anxiety comes from a
Several years ago, my marriage counselor shared a piece of wisdom with me that fundamentally shifted how I view communication: Defensiveness is the weakest posture in an interaction. I saw this play out recently during a presentation at a city council meeting. A consultant was pitching a proposal, and the mayor questioned the data regarding
The all-girls chorus sang first in our recent high school choir concert. Their voices were beautiful as they harmonized in unity. If you closed your eyes, you’d think they were angels. But seeing them made me think that they probably didn’t all view themselves as angels. Do you know what someone looks like when they
I would be a better version of myself if I were more consistent with some habits. Because of that, I’m joining millions of other humans this month in considering making a resolution for the year. James Clear, who is widely recognized as the author of the best book on habits, says the key with resolutions
You should stop what you’re doing and watch this video. If you’ve already seen it, watch it again. That’s Fernando Mendoza, the quarterback of the Indiana Hoosiers football team, being interviewed after Indiana defeated Ohio State to win the Big 10 championship and become the undefeated nationally top-ranked college team heading into the playoffs. Prior
Last weekend, my wife and I had a simple disagreement. It should have been resolved quickly because we generally communicate well with each other. This time we didn’t. Something about this particular disagreement … this particular situation … in this particular moment escalated. In retrospect, we should have seen it coming. Our only escalated conflict
Leo flinched and shot up, his eyes darting wildly. “What was that? Oh no, not now.” As his colleague Maya calmly assessed the fallen supply rack, Leo fumbled for his phone and hit the button for maintenance, his face heating up in stress and irritation. With clipped, exasperated breaths, he began to explain the problem,
Imagine a flight where the pilot, instead of following standard procedures, decides to do things based on their mood. One day, they might be meticulous with their pre-flight checks, and the next, they might rush through them. Naturally, this unpredictable behavior would make the co-pilot and crew highly anxious! They wouldn’t know what to expect,
When I went through marriage counseling, one of the biggest realizations I had was this: Criticism that contradicts my idealized self-image makes me very defensive. It’s sometimes referred to as an identity quake: a rocked self-image that can be disorienting and triggering. For example, part of my self-image is that I’m highly focused on others.
I’m in the process of recruiting people to participate in a few events I’m hosting. I’m aware every time I send an invitee an email that I’m dependent upon them to achieve my goals. It would be easiest to not take on this recruiting effort, or to just blast out some information and hope people
Matt Norman is president of Norman & Associates, which offers Dale Carnegie Training in the North Central US. Dale Carnegie Training is a global organization ...READ MORE