The lone wolf is a classic trope that’s often celebrated in American and other cultures. One example can be found in the new George Clooney-Brad Pitt movie “Wolfs.” While their characters are forced to work together, each is convinced that they’re the only one who can do the job and that they don’t need any
Recently I went running with some friends. It started out rough, though, because my stomach hurt and I felt lightheaded. “Oh no!” I thought. “I’m not going to be able to keep pace with them, and this is going to be awful.” My muscles tightened, I started to worry, and I did slow down. Then
There’s a beautiful and instructive scene in the movie Inside Out when Bing Bong doesn’t want to keep going because he’s so upset about the changes happening around him. The character representing Joy becomes frustrated and tries to coax Bing Bong to move on. “It’s going to be OK, we can fix this,” she cheers.
My friend Jamie leads a large technology organization. Last week I joined him for an all-hands Q&A about my latest book, Lead with Influence. Jamie previously read and reviewed the book, so he asked really thoughtful questions that apply especially to knowledge workers. Because so many readers of my posts are in knowledge work and,
Last week a client who leads HR for her company said to me, “I did a hundred things today. Why didn’t anything happen?! I got insurance cards out, reset logins, answered emails, sat through meetings…but I don’t think I drove any meaningful progress.” Ah, the tyranny of the urgent, the whirlwind of demands. It’s a
I work closely with a company that designs and manufactures expensive boats. One of their long-time customers, a large boat dealer, asked for a meeting with them to discuss boat design improvements they believe are needed to sell more boats. The dealer has a long pattern of harsh criticism and negativity. At the same time,
An executive I once reported to made something very clear: His job was to focus one to five years out, my job was to focus three to 12 months ahead, and the people reporting to me were to focus on the current quarter. I remember being somewhat relieved by this limited responsibility, thinking, “I can’t
A colleague recently made an important decision that affected me without asking for my input. It wasn’t the first time this happened and probably won’t be the last. It seems to be a pattern, to make decisions without involving others when the decisions impact others in meaningful ways. The question I’m wrestling with is: Should
My last article presented 10 forms of personal reactivity that everyone should carefully manage. Whether it’s anger, anxiety, worry, blame, insecurity or lack of boundaries, emotional triggers disrupt relationship health. While those reactions might be our default responses, awareness helps us interrupt the patterns and make different choices about how we behave, especially in challenging
Recently, I came on too strong with someone. My voice was a bit loud and aggressive. My words were harsh. I was right to be upset, but my reaction only escalated the situation, and the relationship was strained as a result. In the end, I’m not sure anything productive was accomplished. Perhaps I drove my
Matt Norman is president of Norman & Associates, which offers Dale Carnegie Training in the North Central US. Dale Carnegie Training is a global organization ...READ MORE